In a surprise move this afternoon, an online petition signed by vast numbers of the UK to bar Donald Trump from entering the country has extended the potential ban to the entirety of the House of Commons.
David Jones, who coordinated the petition, announced on Twitter that he has “amended the online petition to further target every MP in the country!” In a later press release, he explained that “in today’s House of Commons debate, our MPs used some utterly ridiculous insults which are frankly embarrassing.”
Mr Jones went on to claim that “the wording of their abuse highlights how unrepresentative our political system is. The only way to improve it is to completely get rid of them.”
His comments came amid reports that MPs today labelled the US politician as “an idiot”, a “buffoon” and a “wazzock”. The coordinator suggested that he may “consider letting MPs stay in the country if they learn some proper insults, like schmuck or f**ktard.”
In other news, wrongly-accused Jihadi Jack has released a statement detailing the only thing admirable about Jihadi John was his passion for alliteration.